Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Ok, I need some advice only honest and serious people.?

I am 26 years old and still living with my parents at home. I messed up in my life and dropped out of college so many times, yet I am back in college again. I told my parents today that I am planning on transfering to a new out of state university by next year, probably by the Fall or Winter semester. My parents don't want me to go to an out of state university because they know I will go into debt, because I will have to pay for room and board and out of state tuition. I told them I am not happy at this current school, I am not happy where I live (state) and I definatly want to move out of my house already. The thing is that I know they are somewhat right but I want to try new things and try to become a responsible adult and not having to ask or tell my parents my plans or ideas. They are very strict but somewhat understanding. I really want to move to a new state and new university (where at least I can get a bachelor in what I really want) but my parents think I should wait longer, try to graduate(which will take me about 4 years because I took some courses in out of sequence) and then try to find a job in another state. Or should I just go with I have planned, get into debt, move to a new state/city/university and try to be happy? Any ideas, comments, points of view. Greatly appreciated.Ok, I need some advice only honest and serious people.?
I think this is a great opportunity for you. I would definitely go with what you want (degree) and know quite a few friends who went to other states for theirs and it was a great experience for them. Yes, most preferred the other states and half stayed in those other states. I think it's a great idea, albeit scary, but I'm sure it will be worth it. Have confidence! Loans are scary, but with the degree (and thus job) of your choice, you should be able to handle them... better to pay for a good education than get crap salary for ever.... Best of luck to ya!!!!Ok, I need some advice only honest and serious people.?
Yes, I'd say at 26 its time to get out of parent's house and be an adult and quit flopping around.





Maybe a career counselor or life coach could help you solidify which direction to take. It may not be college again. It might be something else before college.





Finding your own path is important and maybe your parents are too close to the situation to be your best counselor.
i wouldn't get into that debt if i were you, i keep hearing 2008 the economy is going to be screwed so...
Well, based on your icon you can always make $2,000 a week pole dancing or $200 a week stocking shelves at K mart!





The ball's in your court!
It sounds to me like your life has been very unstable and you aren't very happy, and you keep putting your hopes in some new scheme to make you happy. The problem is that only you can make yourself happy. If you aren't comfortable with yourself, no new state, school, or major is going to do it for you. In fact, if things aren't as you hope they will be, you would be without your support systems, and without money.





I suspect that your parents are afraid that you will fall apart again if you move away, and it will be harder for them to keep you out of trouble.





I can certainly understand your wanting to move out of your parents' house at 26 (I moved out at 17), but I'm not sure you have really thought all of this through. If you had a very specific plan and considered all contingencies, your parents might be more inclined to support your plans.
I think that for your sake you should try to find some kind of middle ground. stay at your college you might not be happy with it but if you dropped out as many times as you say new colleges might not trust you. But still move out of your parents house. without having to pay for room and board you can save money plus have some independence. I don't think you should move out of state. A bill for an out of state college can reach up to 25,000 to 30,000 dollars. And you might still want


to get an apartment too, so you got work and school in a new state where you don't know anyone, alone.Then the debt you'll probably put yourself in will add stress on top of everything else. Stay in state, but move out. there will be plenty of time to move when you get some kind of foundation and stability, and a degree will give you that.





Good Luck! : )





P.S. don't be ashamed that you have to ask your parents or tell them your ideas. You need help and direction, these are big decisions and you need real answers. Remember: being adult doesn't mean solving your own problems, being adult is knowing when you need help solving your own problems ; )
Keep in mind that transferring out-of-state would earn you out of state tutiion at that school for the next 4 years. Calculate how much you are going to have to borrow to get your bachelors degree and then how much your payments would be. For example...out-of-state tuition and room and board for college A would be (for example) $24,000 per year for 4 years: loan debt of $96,000. and earn you a payment of 960 a month.


What would your loan debt be if you stayed?





If you have a history of dropping out, they prob fear you will do it again. It's just that if you do it while out of state, you'll have the added bonus of huge debt and no degree.

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