What is the best way to deal with people who offer unsolicited parenting advice?

I'm a first time mother with a nine-month-old son. As every mother knows, it's a very rewarding job, but also a very difficult job at times. I've been finding, however, that the most difficult part, at least for me, is being constantly harangued by complete strangers who think they know what's better for my son than I do. I truly don't care what these nosy know-it-alls think -- they can think whatever they like -- I just don't like hearing about it. I don't walk up to strangers and start telling them how to take care of their kids; I'd like the same courtesy!





Do strangers pick on every woman with a baby? Is it some sort of weird ';rite of passage?'; Or do I just have the rotten luck of being around a community of people who like sticking their noses in other people's business? If this happens to any other mothers out there, can you tell me how you deal with it? Thanks!What is the best way to deal with people who offer unsolicited parenting advice?
You cut them off and say, ';I teach my child not to talk to strangers, didn't your mother teach you that?'; If they say ';yes'; than say, ';well do you know me or my child?'; When they ramble on you just shush them. Shhhh!





Ok that is the movie version of what I think you should say. lol....





In reality I think that most people who offer advice are well intentioned. They don't mean it as an insult to you, they are just trying to share their experience and trying to give you some short cuts in parenting that they wish they knew when they had a 9 month old.


You might already know it all, or you might WANT to learn in your own way/time.... but just accept the intentions as good, or you can kindly say, ';Thank you for the advice however I know my babys needs best';. And smile sweetly.What is the best way to deal with people who offer unsolicited parenting advice?
If it's a nice older lady, I just smile and walk away. If it's a crabby middle-aged lady who is rude and judgmental when giving the advice, it is very satifying to say something rude and witty back before walking away. Seriously, people need to mind their own business and not be so judgmental. Don't take it personally. It does happen to all of us.
I think this has happened to everyone who is a mother. You say that the people are complete strangers, then of course, they have not earned the privilege of giving you advise. What I would do, is say thank you, turn away and completely ignore them. If you know the person very well, then maybe they are truly trying to be helpful. We have to always remember that someone will try and make something their business, that truly isn't. Hang in there!
Not all the time, but yes, sometimes older women come up and suggest I do something differently. Most of the time its something like 'he should be drinking milk, not pop!' (when my son is lactose intolerant) and it something they have no way of knowing, but its still annoying. I usually just say it really bluntly 'he's lactose intolerant' and then look away and hope that that deters them from approaching anyone else with annoying advice. Hope this helps you!
To be honest it hasnt happen to me. Im a 24 year old mother of 2. The advice I have to hear is my mothers lol... If I was you I would just do like the other ladys said and just smile, maybe not even say thank you unless it's advice you think you could use. cause then they just feel like they can tell you what ever they want.
The way i see it, you can do 2 things. Pretend you are listening to the advice and smile and said thank or you can tell them straight up, i appreciate you taking your time to tell me this but i dint ask for your advice so please don't give it.
Everyone has pretty much has the same path as I do...Say Thanks and go about your business. If you let it get to you, it will destroy you!! it will continue long after your baby is walking, talking and asking to borrow the car keys...
It happens to everyone. Just say thank you and walk away.





I am used to it, I just nod and say thanks. People have the strangest things to say.
Its happens everywhere. You just learn to ignore it, and just nod your head say thanks and walk away.
you can choose to ignore them or say thank you.
it shouldnt matter. smile and nod, everyone has an opinion, just ignore it.
Let them know that you neither asked their opinion or desire it.
Just smile, say thank you and walk away. It happens to all of us.
Generally this situation is presented when experienced mother witnesses a new mom struggling or seemingly in need of a hand. It's a show of help but you apparently don't need it because you have it all under control. Then realize that the help being offered is also for that child you hold that someone is ';trying'; to help you out so people don't have to watch you hurt it by making mistakes. Most people would be thankful for an open hand of help but the there's those who would prefer to learn the hard way because of pride. Just be polite and let them know you are greatful and you have it well in hand. New moms are like just that easy to spot. Ever wonder why? Think about it.
What does it cost you to listen to advice? Sounds like you are insecure and easily intimidated ... get over it! Welcome to living in society! So it is still YOU who gets to decide whether to follow the advice or not! Okay... so you've been a mom for 9 months. You know your son better than anyone, but as a new mom, you are also encountering things that you have never encountered before... why on earth wouldn't you WANT to hear advice from moms who have navigated those waters before? No... they don't necessarily know what is best for YOUR son, but their experiences are worthy of consideration! This definately sounds like YOUR issue not the well meaning strangers!