Although, both of us are not virgins, my boyfriend and me are waiting till marriage to have sex. And we have now been going out for almost a year. I want to know how far is right to go sexually. What are your experiences? How do you fight off temptations? when or where is the best time to stop so ?People who are or have waited for sex till marriage, how far do you go? When do you stop? Advice please!!!!?
Its extremely easy to give in unless you put plenty of space between you and sex. I know a lot of people who abstain before marriage, and this is what they commonly do:
Most importantly no more than light kissing (no frenching, not longer than 10 sec)
Make sure others know about it, even promise you'll call them if you ever do it (it works)
Don't lay down near each other
Don't snuggle or lay together under a blanket
Don't stay anywhere that's dark (tv at home, parked car)
Don't linger in privacy, save intimate talks for public places
Avoid tempting clothes, including low cut, shoulderless, belly-showing, or short skirt/shorts.
Some advice from Gordon B. Hinckley, president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day saints: ';Petting frequently leads to [sex]... it has done so with thousands...'; He has also said that even the best man and women will give in to temptation if left alone in a dark parked car long enough.
I'm abstaining until marriage too. Good luck!People who are or have waited for sex till marriage, how far do you go? When do you stop? Advice please!!!!?
Don't put yourself in a situation in which you feel that you will both be tempted to have sex (ie. go on group dates, don't spend too much time alone, etc), if you do feel tempted, spend some time apart (not like on a break) but kinda just giving each other some space, also work on the frendship portion of your relationship (most of the time true friends ont pressure each other for sex)...other than that the rest is up to your better judgement...
just dont
I'm not married yet, but I'm waiting to have sex until I get married and I've gotten pretty good at the whole abstinence thing.
First, you have to tell your boyfriend that you are serious and make sure that he is taking you seriously. Then, you can't be stupid. You have to realize that invitations such as spending the night at their beach hosue without their parents around is, in the male speech, asking you to have sex with them. So, if they ask you if you want to stay with them at their beach house, say, ';Can I bring my best friend along, too?'; And watch their reaction as they realize you aren't on the same page. (Boys are very silly creatures. They really, really, really want sex. But the nice ones will wait for you. And they're the only ones worth having.)
Some tactics that work for me are enlisting my roommate. My boyfriend, my roomie and I watch a movie together and then she leaves to go get coffee or something, and we make out - but it's not enough time to have sex. Or, We're at his house and I text her to call me in ten minutes, come into the room in ten minutes. Or, to give my roommate a break, I just text another friend. Or, I go to my boyfriend's house, when his mom is home, and we both know that we can't do anything when she's home.
Basically, it's all about keeping yourself out of that situation - because face it, if you and your boyfriend were left on an island like the one in Pirates, you'd end up having sex sooner or later, especially with all the rum. Oh, and that's another thing - don't get drunk, because it makes you horny.
And that's all my advice. I hope it helps.
Friday, April 30, 2010
Need some advice on how to make $600.00 stretch for two people each month for food?
My wife and I have decided to spend only $600.00 a month on groceries for us. Will it be enough?
We have spent over $800.00 a month and want to cut back. This will add an extra $200.00 to our savings each month.
Can it be done without starving ourselves to death?Need some advice on how to make $600.00 stretch for two people each month for food?
600 a month for 2 people is plenty.Need some advice on how to make $600.00 stretch for two people each month for food?
You need that much to eat...is this also going out and having meals at restaurants? When I was married we did not spend $200 every two weeks on groceries, I learned to plan for what we ate more often than not and got that...usually buying the generic foods rather than the name brand because they were usually the cheapest to get and most times were better tasting. Use of coupons are good as well when buying food....but $600 is too much to be spending on food alone...what about cleaning supplies, medications, hygene items, clothing that is needed every now and again, shoes, paper good and other things...do you just not spend that much on this...you could cut your groceries down to $300 per month and save even more.
How much do you guys eat?? I spend about $100-$150 a week on groceries for the two of us, and I buy everything I want. So, worst case scenario, I end up spending about $600/mo. on groceries. We don't go out to eat much, maybe a couple of times a month. If I wanted to actually *save* money... Well, I would probably make sure to stock up on items that are on sale (right now, I buy just enough to last us for a week - week and a half). I'd plan my menu better - i.e., I would try and plan to make dishes that used the ingredients I already had on hand, for example - or make more food and freeze for later. I'd definitely cut back on the unnecessary crap like cookies, chips, sodas and the like. I'd shop for produce at the farmers market instead of at the grocery store. We'd order less pizza. These just a few things I would try, just off the top of my head.
P.S. Yeah, we have 3 cats, too, and I probably spend $50/month just on cat litter and food.
Yes, it can be. The trick will be to make a shopping list and stick to it. Avoid impulse buying, processed ';ready-to-eat'; foods, and snack foods like chips, candy and soda. Be sure to read the supermarket sales ads and buy more than one item you know you will use when it is on sale.
Budgets like this are great because not only do you save money, but cutting back on the junk food will improve your health and appearance as well.
Absolutely it's possible . I have fed 4 on just $300.00 a month .
Hamburger . Buy in large quantities , it is cheaper that way .
With hamburger you can make so many things . Example . Spaghetti , meatloaf , taco's , hamburger helper , chili , chili mac , and much more . Chicken . Fried chicken , chicken %26amp; noodles , chicken fried rice , burritos made with chicken or hamburger .
For vegetables and canned fruits buy the off brand . It is just as good and cost 1/2 as much .
The possibilities are endless .
Good luck
Good heavens! Where do you live? We live in downtown Chicago, so it's not an inexpensive place. For two of us we spend about $450 a month on groceries (food and paper products, sundries, cleaning supplies, etc.), and eat quite well (fresh fruits and vegetables, meat, eggs, very few processed foods). However, we don't eat out very often. If your food budget is going to restaurants, cut back there.
Sure it can be done. Eat in not out. Borrow recipe books from the library and make a list of ingredients. Buy in bulk stuff you'll need lots of - flour, canned tomatoes and so on. You could also join a community kitchen, where you share resources, learn cooking skills and get to take home a share of whatever is made. It's a discipline to cook every day but you'll look and feel better AND save money.
It certainly can be done. Tips:
1. Eat out less. Preparing your own food is far, far less expensive.
2. Get a membership in a warehouse grocery, because the prices are so much lower, it will pay for itself.
3. Don't be afraid of generic brands. Many of them are actually brand quality with generic labels slapped on them to sell more (shh, don't tell).
PS - It's nice to see you write a sincere question here.
yes I have a family of 4 and our budget is less than $600./ month
We eat quite well on about $100./ week
the tips are simple
1. do not buy junk food
2. buy fruits %26amp; veggies ( make sure you eat them)
3. cut soda( cokes,ect) out
4. try to not buy the premade just heat %26amp; eat stuff it costs a lot more and really does not save much time.
5. shop w/ cupons %26amp; sale ads, you will get better variety
omg i can do that for me hubby and our 4 kids.. so yes of course you can do that...
i spend about $200 or a little more every two weeks and that lasts us pretty good.. just depends what you buy and how many dishes you get with one thing... like a package of chicken thighs i can make 2 or even 3 entrees with that... my kids are still young so we're good for the moment...
yes you can do it without starving
are you kidding??!! My BF and I have 2 boys, 3 cats, a dog, a baby on the way and other small pets........feeding all of us plus the pets we only spend about $100 a week and sometimes even skip a week of shopping here or there except for milk, bread, eggs. We would be eating like kings on $600/mo. !!
What the heck are you guys eating????????? i feed 7 people a month for about $800.00, they are full meals that consist of different variations of food. How much can you guys eat??????? people don't live to eat, they eat to live. Stop indulging in the crap you really don't need, and dont be fooled by organic stuff either, they are ridicoulsly over priced.
OMG I spend $600 a month for 3 people and a dog and that includes stuff that is not edible like shampoo, toliet paper, paper towels, dog food, etc.
goodness $600 should be plenty for only 2
PS--and I got a big dog 85 pounds
get real the two of us spend 400 a month eat steak etc and wine with our meals unless your making 100k a year cut back we make 50 and eat healthy and well i think you should donate 200 a month to the local food pantry we do
Dude how much do you two eat?
Wow.................
Give up the lobster i guess
OMG!! how much do you two eat??
We use $500 a month for three people.
Stop eating sirloin steak and lobster bisque and learn how to budget.
My boyfriend and I only spend $500-$600 per month on food for both of us and we are certainly nstarving....so you shouldn't have a problem...may have to skip the name brands here and there but it can definitely be done.
do you have children? The average for a family of 4 is $450 a month on food...
I would hope so. My wife and I eat very healthy and spend less than that.
My gosh! That's $150/week! What in the world are you people eating? I feed myself, my husband, 2 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats and 6 fish on less than $400 when I have to. We are far from starving!
Easy.
I have lived on 50.00 for food and gas for one week.
Enough is what YOU think it is. If you want to save you have to pay the price of your food choices.
im barely feeding well three people on less than 400 per month.
and now, worrying that food stamps are next cuz utilities arent being paid so we can eat. i think you can do well with 600
That is more than enough for two people just for food.
Try to eat in as much as possible and eat Breakfast for Dinner twice a week. It will save a lot of money =)
Hope This Helps!
i have a family of six and only spend around this amount.
what the heck are you eating?
We spend less than that, and that's with going out to eat at least twice a week. It's not hard at all.
If two people can't survive on $600.00 food allowance, you need to get rid of the Elephants at the dinner table. That's a couple of over eating DOLTS!
we are 2, with animals, cats %26amp; dogs and eat very well on less than $400.00 a month.
We go to stores with lower pricing and bulk foods
bargain hunting is a blast, when you save money
Are you kidding? We spend about $500 a month on three of us - in Connecticut of all places...if you two can't feed yourselves on $600 a month there is no hope...
We have spent over $800.00 a month and want to cut back. This will add an extra $200.00 to our savings each month.
Can it be done without starving ourselves to death?Need some advice on how to make $600.00 stretch for two people each month for food?
600 a month for 2 people is plenty.Need some advice on how to make $600.00 stretch for two people each month for food?
You need that much to eat...is this also going out and having meals at restaurants? When I was married we did not spend $200 every two weeks on groceries, I learned to plan for what we ate more often than not and got that...usually buying the generic foods rather than the name brand because they were usually the cheapest to get and most times were better tasting. Use of coupons are good as well when buying food....but $600 is too much to be spending on food alone...what about cleaning supplies, medications, hygene items, clothing that is needed every now and again, shoes, paper good and other things...do you just not spend that much on this...you could cut your groceries down to $300 per month and save even more.
How much do you guys eat?? I spend about $100-$150 a week on groceries for the two of us, and I buy everything I want. So, worst case scenario, I end up spending about $600/mo. on groceries. We don't go out to eat much, maybe a couple of times a month. If I wanted to actually *save* money... Well, I would probably make sure to stock up on items that are on sale (right now, I buy just enough to last us for a week - week and a half). I'd plan my menu better - i.e., I would try and plan to make dishes that used the ingredients I already had on hand, for example - or make more food and freeze for later. I'd definitely cut back on the unnecessary crap like cookies, chips, sodas and the like. I'd shop for produce at the farmers market instead of at the grocery store. We'd order less pizza. These just a few things I would try, just off the top of my head.
P.S. Yeah, we have 3 cats, too, and I probably spend $50/month just on cat litter and food.
Yes, it can be. The trick will be to make a shopping list and stick to it. Avoid impulse buying, processed ';ready-to-eat'; foods, and snack foods like chips, candy and soda. Be sure to read the supermarket sales ads and buy more than one item you know you will use when it is on sale.
Budgets like this are great because not only do you save money, but cutting back on the junk food will improve your health and appearance as well.
Absolutely it's possible . I have fed 4 on just $300.00 a month .
Hamburger . Buy in large quantities , it is cheaper that way .
With hamburger you can make so many things . Example . Spaghetti , meatloaf , taco's , hamburger helper , chili , chili mac , and much more . Chicken . Fried chicken , chicken %26amp; noodles , chicken fried rice , burritos made with chicken or hamburger .
For vegetables and canned fruits buy the off brand . It is just as good and cost 1/2 as much .
The possibilities are endless .
Good luck
Good heavens! Where do you live? We live in downtown Chicago, so it's not an inexpensive place. For two of us we spend about $450 a month on groceries (food and paper products, sundries, cleaning supplies, etc.), and eat quite well (fresh fruits and vegetables, meat, eggs, very few processed foods). However, we don't eat out very often. If your food budget is going to restaurants, cut back there.
Sure it can be done. Eat in not out. Borrow recipe books from the library and make a list of ingredients. Buy in bulk stuff you'll need lots of - flour, canned tomatoes and so on. You could also join a community kitchen, where you share resources, learn cooking skills and get to take home a share of whatever is made. It's a discipline to cook every day but you'll look and feel better AND save money.
It certainly can be done. Tips:
1. Eat out less. Preparing your own food is far, far less expensive.
2. Get a membership in a warehouse grocery, because the prices are so much lower, it will pay for itself.
3. Don't be afraid of generic brands. Many of them are actually brand quality with generic labels slapped on them to sell more (shh, don't tell).
PS - It's nice to see you write a sincere question here.
yes I have a family of 4 and our budget is less than $600./ month
We eat quite well on about $100./ week
the tips are simple
1. do not buy junk food
2. buy fruits %26amp; veggies ( make sure you eat them)
3. cut soda( cokes,ect) out
4. try to not buy the premade just heat %26amp; eat stuff it costs a lot more and really does not save much time.
5. shop w/ cupons %26amp; sale ads, you will get better variety
omg i can do that for me hubby and our 4 kids.. so yes of course you can do that...
i spend about $200 or a little more every two weeks and that lasts us pretty good.. just depends what you buy and how many dishes you get with one thing... like a package of chicken thighs i can make 2 or even 3 entrees with that... my kids are still young so we're good for the moment...
yes you can do it without starving
are you kidding??!! My BF and I have 2 boys, 3 cats, a dog, a baby on the way and other small pets........feeding all of us plus the pets we only spend about $100 a week and sometimes even skip a week of shopping here or there except for milk, bread, eggs. We would be eating like kings on $600/mo. !!
What the heck are you guys eating????????? i feed 7 people a month for about $800.00, they are full meals that consist of different variations of food. How much can you guys eat??????? people don't live to eat, they eat to live. Stop indulging in the crap you really don't need, and dont be fooled by organic stuff either, they are ridicoulsly over priced.
OMG I spend $600 a month for 3 people and a dog and that includes stuff that is not edible like shampoo, toliet paper, paper towels, dog food, etc.
goodness $600 should be plenty for only 2
PS--and I got a big dog 85 pounds
get real the two of us spend 400 a month eat steak etc and wine with our meals unless your making 100k a year cut back we make 50 and eat healthy and well i think you should donate 200 a month to the local food pantry we do
Dude how much do you two eat?
Wow.................
Give up the lobster i guess
OMG!! how much do you two eat??
We use $500 a month for three people.
Stop eating sirloin steak and lobster bisque and learn how to budget.
My boyfriend and I only spend $500-$600 per month on food for both of us and we are certainly nstarving....so you shouldn't have a problem...may have to skip the name brands here and there but it can definitely be done.
do you have children? The average for a family of 4 is $450 a month on food...
I would hope so. My wife and I eat very healthy and spend less than that.
My gosh! That's $150/week! What in the world are you people eating? I feed myself, my husband, 2 kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats and 6 fish on less than $400 when I have to. We are far from starving!
Easy.
I have lived on 50.00 for food and gas for one week.
Enough is what YOU think it is. If you want to save you have to pay the price of your food choices.
im barely feeding well three people on less than 400 per month.
and now, worrying that food stamps are next cuz utilities arent being paid so we can eat. i think you can do well with 600
That is more than enough for two people just for food.
Try to eat in as much as possible and eat Breakfast for Dinner twice a week. It will save a lot of money =)
Hope This Helps!
i have a family of six and only spend around this amount.
what the heck are you eating?
We spend less than that, and that's with going out to eat at least twice a week. It's not hard at all.
If two people can't survive on $600.00 food allowance, you need to get rid of the Elephants at the dinner table. That's a couple of over eating DOLTS!
we are 2, with animals, cats %26amp; dogs and eat very well on less than $400.00 a month.
We go to stores with lower pricing and bulk foods
bargain hunting is a blast, when you save money
Are you kidding? We spend about $500 a month on three of us - in Connecticut of all places...if you two can't feed yourselves on $600 a month there is no hope...
Help Nathan!!! he really likes me and im starting to like him. need advice plz! A BUNCH OF PEOPLE PLZ REPLY鈾モ櫏鈾?
Ok well theres this guy name Nathan who is in my p.e class and i guess he has been liking me since school has started. And my friend was telling me that she talked to him on the phone and he said he likes me and he thinks im beatiful and stuff. And today my friend asked him again (my friends always go up to him and ask him if he likes me) if he likes me and he said yes and my friend told him that i think hes cute and i usually point him out to her when i see him. And she told him to ask me out but he said that it dosent seem like i like him because of something about him saying hi and me doing something.. im not sure ahha.
But anyways he might ask me out! But the problem is is that we never talk! all we do is smile and say hi thats it. So is there any way i can talk to him or get his attention or flirt or something haha.Help Nathan!!! he really likes me and im starting to like him. need advice plz! A BUNCH OF PEOPLE PLZ REPLY鈾モ櫏鈾?
You don't need to try to get his attention. You have his attention. He obviously pays a lot of attention to you, but you probably don't notice. I mean if a guy can stand a bunch of girls going up to him all the time asking him the same question than I'm pretty sure he really does like you.
So ways to talk to him:
1) On the phone
2) Send a note
3) In between classes
4) After school
5) Schedule a lunch hour together.
You can talk to him about things you guys are interested in, things at school, whatever to get the conversation started. Than the conversation should flow.Help Nathan!!! he really likes me and im starting to like him. need advice plz! A BUNCH OF PEOPLE PLZ REPLY鈾モ櫏鈾?
Go and talk to him.Start in your pe class, when you guys run or do an activity try to go where he is at and then ask him a question or tell him a comment about the sport or activity you're doing in pe..like Im tired and you';..and then ';how you been';..and start talking to him.. tell me if it works!..Good luck
find something in common or find someone elserefill
But anyways he might ask me out! But the problem is is that we never talk! all we do is smile and say hi thats it. So is there any way i can talk to him or get his attention or flirt or something haha.Help Nathan!!! he really likes me and im starting to like him. need advice plz! A BUNCH OF PEOPLE PLZ REPLY鈾モ櫏鈾?
You don't need to try to get his attention. You have his attention. He obviously pays a lot of attention to you, but you probably don't notice. I mean if a guy can stand a bunch of girls going up to him all the time asking him the same question than I'm pretty sure he really does like you.
So ways to talk to him:
1) On the phone
2) Send a note
3) In between classes
4) After school
5) Schedule a lunch hour together.
You can talk to him about things you guys are interested in, things at school, whatever to get the conversation started. Than the conversation should flow.Help Nathan!!! he really likes me and im starting to like him. need advice plz! A BUNCH OF PEOPLE PLZ REPLY鈾モ櫏鈾?
Go and talk to him.Start in your pe class, when you guys run or do an activity try to go where he is at and then ask him a question or tell him a comment about the sport or activity you're doing in pe..like Im tired and you';..and then ';how you been';..and start talking to him.. tell me if it works!..Good luck
find something in common or find someone else
Doing this for Fiance's mom, please help me out, I need advice for her about irresponsible people.....?
Ok, I need advice. This might be long. READ IT ALL OR DON'T POST.
I live with my Fiance', his mother, little sister, brother, and brother's girlfriend. (Me and my Fiance' are moving out in a few days but that's beside the point). His brother is 24, his brother's girlfriend is 20. Neither have jobs at this point.
The brother and brother's girlfriend are constantly making messes around the house, LARGE messes....leaving piles of clothes all over the place, dirty dishes, things from their room are always in the hallway, the bathroom me and my Fiance' have to share with them is TRASHED. They will NOT clean up their messes. They say they will but never do it, they claim they are depressed and have traumas from being yelled at by the Mom here. The Mom is extremely stressed about to lose the house and they don't pay rent, and she yells at them to clean their messes and they throw it back at her saying how she is traumatizing them into never wanting to come out of their room in fear of getting yelled at. They are extremely complex and we have no idea how to deal with them. I just want to be like ';Wtf clean your mess, the Mom wouldn't yell at you if you didn't make messes';, but I know they would be complicated and say ';Yes she would, she yells at us because she has problems';. When the mom asks them nicely, they say they will do it, then days pass and they never do and she EXPLODES with anger, and they use that against her like ';See! I told you she's crazy!';. The Mom works early in the morning until late at night and they are home all day in their room playing video games, giggling, watching videos when they SHOULD be cleaning up their messes! I have tried talking to them, but they are extremely complex and philosophical, avoiding questions and telling us story after story of times the Mom ';hurt their feelings';, and how they have to be in the ';right mood'; to do things. It's very frustrating. The mother has given them deadlines, but they beg for more time, they have nowhere to go. We have left positive notes of encouragement to clean up messes and they crumble them or turn them upside down to be funny or deface them. The Mother has no money to move out and is actually considering bankruptcy. Whenever I talk with them I end up feeling guilty with their frowns and depressing words! They are manipulative it seems.
The mother has threatened to kick them out, but she doesn't have the heart to kick out her own son. I don't know if I should believe them about being depressed and traumatized. They don't clean up their own messes, it's their responsibility and it's stressing us all out. They are ADULTS for crying out loud!
I am asking for the Mother, I know we are moving, but she isn't! She is stuck with them!
What can we do?Doing this for Fiance's mom, please help me out, I need advice for her about irresponsible people.....?
You can't do anything to help her. She needs to help herself by kicking those lazy bums out of the house. No matter what you say she will still allow them to behave in this manner. You might try offering her a place to stay with you and your boyfriend with the stipulation that the two mess makers will not be welcome, even for a visit. It may ease her stress, give her a chance to get on her feet, and force the two leeches to take responsibility for themselves.Doing this for Fiance's mom, please help me out, I need advice for her about irresponsible people.....?
Tell her that if she loves her son, she will kick him out and make him take care of himself. He needs to learn to grow up. He will never leave on his own. Never.
I agree with the top two answerers. The mother is enabling them and they are manipulative passive aggressive abusers and they are taking advantage of the moms inability to get tough and defend herself.
The problem is simple and unfortunately as long as the mom lets this continue it's her own fault. She should not listen to their ';complex'; arguments because it is all BS. Just a con game they have figured out and they must be dealt with decisively and immediately for the sake of the mother and it is for their own good as well. But their needs are secondary to the moms needs because they are the perpetrators of this injustice and the mom and you are the victims.
Call the sheriff, have them evicted legally. They won't be able to con the police.
As far as you are concerned you need to get out of the situation and they have to deal with it themselves. I understand your concern but you can't know everything that this family went through to get to this point. The mother may have been abusive at some point and is now getting her karma. But whose fault it is is irrelevant at this point. The cycle of abuse must be stopped and there's really nothing you can do until they realize what they are doing is wrong and seek help themselves. We're talking about adults here and they are responsible for themselves. Thank God you are moving out. You can be supportive but don't make it your problem, it's their problem and they have to figure it out.
I live with my Fiance', his mother, little sister, brother, and brother's girlfriend. (Me and my Fiance' are moving out in a few days but that's beside the point). His brother is 24, his brother's girlfriend is 20. Neither have jobs at this point.
The brother and brother's girlfriend are constantly making messes around the house, LARGE messes....leaving piles of clothes all over the place, dirty dishes, things from their room are always in the hallway, the bathroom me and my Fiance' have to share with them is TRASHED. They will NOT clean up their messes. They say they will but never do it, they claim they are depressed and have traumas from being yelled at by the Mom here. The Mom is extremely stressed about to lose the house and they don't pay rent, and she yells at them to clean their messes and they throw it back at her saying how she is traumatizing them into never wanting to come out of their room in fear of getting yelled at. They are extremely complex and we have no idea how to deal with them. I just want to be like ';Wtf clean your mess, the Mom wouldn't yell at you if you didn't make messes';, but I know they would be complicated and say ';Yes she would, she yells at us because she has problems';. When the mom asks them nicely, they say they will do it, then days pass and they never do and she EXPLODES with anger, and they use that against her like ';See! I told you she's crazy!';. The Mom works early in the morning until late at night and they are home all day in their room playing video games, giggling, watching videos when they SHOULD be cleaning up their messes! I have tried talking to them, but they are extremely complex and philosophical, avoiding questions and telling us story after story of times the Mom ';hurt their feelings';, and how they have to be in the ';right mood'; to do things. It's very frustrating. The mother has given them deadlines, but they beg for more time, they have nowhere to go. We have left positive notes of encouragement to clean up messes and they crumble them or turn them upside down to be funny or deface them. The Mother has no money to move out and is actually considering bankruptcy. Whenever I talk with them I end up feeling guilty with their frowns and depressing words! They are manipulative it seems.
The mother has threatened to kick them out, but she doesn't have the heart to kick out her own son. I don't know if I should believe them about being depressed and traumatized. They don't clean up their own messes, it's their responsibility and it's stressing us all out. They are ADULTS for crying out loud!
I am asking for the Mother, I know we are moving, but she isn't! She is stuck with them!
What can we do?Doing this for Fiance's mom, please help me out, I need advice for her about irresponsible people.....?
You can't do anything to help her. She needs to help herself by kicking those lazy bums out of the house. No matter what you say she will still allow them to behave in this manner. You might try offering her a place to stay with you and your boyfriend with the stipulation that the two mess makers will not be welcome, even for a visit. It may ease her stress, give her a chance to get on her feet, and force the two leeches to take responsibility for themselves.Doing this for Fiance's mom, please help me out, I need advice for her about irresponsible people.....?
Tell her that if she loves her son, she will kick him out and make him take care of himself. He needs to learn to grow up. He will never leave on his own. Never.
I agree with the top two answerers. The mother is enabling them and they are manipulative passive aggressive abusers and they are taking advantage of the moms inability to get tough and defend herself.
The problem is simple and unfortunately as long as the mom lets this continue it's her own fault. She should not listen to their ';complex'; arguments because it is all BS. Just a con game they have figured out and they must be dealt with decisively and immediately for the sake of the mother and it is for their own good as well. But their needs are secondary to the moms needs because they are the perpetrators of this injustice and the mom and you are the victims.
Call the sheriff, have them evicted legally. They won't be able to con the police.
As far as you are concerned you need to get out of the situation and they have to deal with it themselves. I understand your concern but you can't know everything that this family went through to get to this point. The mother may have been abusive at some point and is now getting her karma. But whose fault it is is irrelevant at this point. The cycle of abuse must be stopped and there's really nothing you can do until they realize what they are doing is wrong and seek help themselves. We're talking about adults here and they are responsible for themselves. Thank God you are moving out. You can be supportive but don't make it your problem, it's their problem and they have to figure it out.
Plz only serious intelligent people should answer.need good advice. i knew this guy...?
i was not attracted romantically but he had always been attracted to me.I wasn't gona date him cuz even thou our personalities are similar,we are amazingly different at the same time. He is a stereo typical rocker/metalhead right down to the drinking %26amp;drugs %26amp;playing kickass guitar! I'm mature,serious,devoted 2 school%26amp; work%26amp; don't drink/smoke. He%26amp;I were there 4 each other when bad things happened and just over a couple of months we're almost like best friends we just have this amazing connection %26amp; then somehow we started dating.it was very troublesome in the beginning we broke up twice in the 1st week(cuz we felt uncomfy cuz we were like best friends)but always got back 2gether in a day or2.Then his drinking%26amp; smoking really got to me(it never did when we were friends but its different when ur a couple)we broke up(3rd time),we were still good friends, he was sad and told me he wanted me back and he will change.I told him it鈥檚 a bad idea and that its not fair to him to change 4 someone unless he wants to change for himself. and that he did %26amp; didn't do drugs/drink 4 a week, he complained about being sober all the time but also said that he is doing this for us and its important to him. then he did acid %26amp; told me cuz he can鈥檛 lie to me. I can鈥檛 deal with him being f***ed up,I love him no matter what ,I did and always will but he is what he does and its not fair 4 either of us to make a compromise. he is unhappy if he doesn鈥檛 do drugs and I鈥檓 stressed out when he does.and hes also moving away but wants to keep up a long distance relationship.his friends never liked me cauz I鈥檓 too clean 4 them %26amp;him. should I end this for good %26amp;just be friends??i鈥檓 so confused!plz help!!we鈥檝e known each other since august and have been dating for 3 weeks now.i鈥檓 two yrs older than him.he doesn鈥檛 plan on going to school but he works and pays his bills responsibly but also wastes a bunch of money on drugs鈥lz guide me.i don鈥檛 want to lose him or him to be hurt if he doesn鈥檛 have me by his side but I can鈥檛 keep hurting myself by putting up with what I don鈥檛 approve of PLZ HELP!!!Plz only serious intelligent people should answer.need good advice. i knew this guy...?
You know, while it is important to care about other people and the like at times its no good sacrificing your life just to make sure other people feel good and are not hurt, think about your future and do what is good and best for you. Your Dude is an addict and he wont change. You mentioned you are too clean for him and his mates, therefore can conclude is not even your class, ask yourself what you love in the guy, be focused, look beyond immediate things, have ego although too much of this is not good but it matters. My last advice is that get over him and move on, i know u luv the guy, but in life you have to learn to love and let go, there are so many guys out there who are not even on drugs or you can even try me.Hey just hurt him this time for your own good......move on my lady
In future try to be careful, you appear to be too weak to fall in love, how do you honestly love him this much when you only new him in August?Plz only serious intelligent people should answer.need good advice. i knew this guy...?
love is a lie, hunny walk away from him , he's using you to get to six.
find you'r self some other shuger dady
My advice to you would be to move on, you sound like you are a good girl with a good head on your shoulders and a heart of pure gold, why should you throw away what you have worked for when this guy will go back to his old ways soon. I hope you find someone else more deserving of you. Good luck and don't try to raise him it won't work.
Your question is very short.
Make it little long.
Perhapas that will help.
Not me,others only.
I am SERIOUS.
.........cut him loose!..............or yuh gonna end up with a future full of argument's and headache's!.......
Yes Dr Phil drug intervention...
The smart thing is to leave this guy because you would end up in a very unhappy realtionship. Yes in a relatonship there are compromises but don't mix up a compromise with just holding on. He is not a good idea for you and it is good that he is moving away from you so that you could get over him. He needs a rehab centre and you should as his friend advise him since it seems that you are his only friend. Also let him know that the people who are encourage him to take drugs and drink are not his friends. Friends are people that wants the best for you. He would only stop for a while for you and guess what when he gets comfortable with you he would go back to his dirty habits again. Try to make a clean break if he doesn't take your advice because he seems to me that he is a very unambitious slub and no woman needs that in her life. He is not even trying to better himself by going to school to further his education to make a better life. If he really cared about you or living in fact he would have tried to better himself.Things are getting more and more expensive all around us so in the end his wife would be minding him with the little jobs that he could get with his limited education. Try to encourage him to further himself and make him realise that he is wasting his life on things that aren't worth a penny. I feel very sad to read about his story and i hope that he cleans up his act for his own sake not yours or anyone elses.
i dont think you need to be ';together'; to be there for him. you can stay friends just like you were but if your lifestyles are completely different then it will be very hard to be together. you were right about him having to change for himself first and i think you should wait for that to happen before you can be with him on a bigger level. there is no sense in just breaking up every other day. talk to him and tell him you want to be close friends but nothing more - its always a possibility for the future
Honestly, I think you two should remain friends. you two are too different!! Not going to school %26amp; not having or even caring about having a relationship is too big of a deal just ignore, not to mention the drug %26amp; alcohol problem, he even told u it'z hard for him to change, so why would u waist your time or someone like that? especially ';long distance';! It'z just too much, %26amp; u've only dated him for 3 weeks. Liking or loving someone az a friend, doeznt mean u can love/like that person az anything more, keep that in mind, u guyz are too different, hiz friendz don't like u, hiz flawz are BAD, drugs %26amp; alcohol are seriouse stuff, So imagine this, ur dating a drugie, who'z not even there!! It'z just not worth it , it'll never work out, I say stay good friendz %26amp; that it, %26amp; IF he doez change '; while u two are friendz '; then u can give it another chance, that's ';if'; u still felt the same.
Get rid of him he makes you ramble.
such a long question, i struggled reading it all.
here's what i think...you should write down the pros and cons of dating him. if there are more pros, then go for it, if more cons, leave him. especially since he's moving away.
i've dated a drug addict for 2 years and it was just too complicated, one day, he's gonna come to you and ask for money, one day you'll caught him doing something bad just so he could get drugs.
maybe his moving away is a sign that you two are just not meant to be? i don't know, but do write that pros and cons thing i told you about. it'll help you decide.
Move on honey, learn 2 love urself, u r so precious 4 him, move on, when u r near him he couldnt stop doing drugs, do u think that wn u have a long dist. rel.ship, he'll stop. u r so good 4 him %26amp; give urself time %26amp; u'll totally get over him.
My dear friend Jenny.
I know it's the most difficult problem in our life.
But never forget 1 thing- women can do everything.
I believe you can change him , love becomes beautiful when u believe. If u broke, u'll not feel good. Don't do that!
Just know 1 thing u'll be happy, if u fight!
First of all, Lcpl. Burress is right, you're attracted to him for other reason.
Second of all, he is a selffish person. He loves himself more than loving you. He only care for himself, he choose him first. He doesn't worth your love. Think about this. You would change to make him happy. Would he change to make you happy?
if he is used to have drugs you should leave him forever
Why would you want to keep seeing him as miserable as you say you have been with him? He doesn't sound too happy with you either. What good are either one of you getting out of this? It is obvious that he will do drugs and drink until HE is ready to stop. It is just as obvious you will never approve of his lifestyle. Stay friends if you can but forget the dating.
IF YOU NEED TO WRITE THIS LONG
THEN YOU NEED TO GO AN TALK TO
DR.PHIL
Your obviously atrracted to him for some reason maybe the whole bad boy rocker image appeals to you right now and when you get out of school you can settle down
keep him as a friend when he can get away from the life style he has and grows up you two may have a chance but he sounds like a good friend mabey when he moves back to your neck of the woods he will be ready for a relationship
It sounds like you two are better off as friends. You are forcing yourselves to try and make it work, and the keyword is forcing. If it don't come to you smoother or easier, back away from it while you are still friends.
way too long and boreing to read and even think of an answer.
The drug part caught my eye . Stay away from him now and forever
I am going to make this short and sweet. Why do you want to be stupid? He is a bum. You have something going for you. Why do you even want to wipe your feet on him? Move on' go find someone worthy of breathing the same air as you. This guy is on his way down. Don't let him take you with him. Break all ties' Let him go!!!
You know, while it is important to care about other people and the like at times its no good sacrificing your life just to make sure other people feel good and are not hurt, think about your future and do what is good and best for you. Your Dude is an addict and he wont change. You mentioned you are too clean for him and his mates, therefore can conclude is not even your class, ask yourself what you love in the guy, be focused, look beyond immediate things, have ego although too much of this is not good but it matters. My last advice is that get over him and move on, i know u luv the guy, but in life you have to learn to love and let go, there are so many guys out there who are not even on drugs or you can even try me.Hey just hurt him this time for your own good......move on my lady
In future try to be careful, you appear to be too weak to fall in love, how do you honestly love him this much when you only new him in August?Plz only serious intelligent people should answer.need good advice. i knew this guy...?
love is a lie, hunny walk away from him , he's using you to get to six.
find you'r self some other shuger dady
My advice to you would be to move on, you sound like you are a good girl with a good head on your shoulders and a heart of pure gold, why should you throw away what you have worked for when this guy will go back to his old ways soon. I hope you find someone else more deserving of you. Good luck and don't try to raise him it won't work.
Your question is very short.
Make it little long.
Perhapas that will help.
Not me,others only.
I am SERIOUS.
.........cut him loose!..............or yuh gonna end up with a future full of argument's and headache's!.......
Yes Dr Phil drug intervention...
The smart thing is to leave this guy because you would end up in a very unhappy realtionship. Yes in a relatonship there are compromises but don't mix up a compromise with just holding on. He is not a good idea for you and it is good that he is moving away from you so that you could get over him. He needs a rehab centre and you should as his friend advise him since it seems that you are his only friend. Also let him know that the people who are encourage him to take drugs and drink are not his friends. Friends are people that wants the best for you. He would only stop for a while for you and guess what when he gets comfortable with you he would go back to his dirty habits again. Try to make a clean break if he doesn't take your advice because he seems to me that he is a very unambitious slub and no woman needs that in her life. He is not even trying to better himself by going to school to further his education to make a better life. If he really cared about you or living in fact he would have tried to better himself.Things are getting more and more expensive all around us so in the end his wife would be minding him with the little jobs that he could get with his limited education. Try to encourage him to further himself and make him realise that he is wasting his life on things that aren't worth a penny. I feel very sad to read about his story and i hope that he cleans up his act for his own sake not yours or anyone elses.
i dont think you need to be ';together'; to be there for him. you can stay friends just like you were but if your lifestyles are completely different then it will be very hard to be together. you were right about him having to change for himself first and i think you should wait for that to happen before you can be with him on a bigger level. there is no sense in just breaking up every other day. talk to him and tell him you want to be close friends but nothing more - its always a possibility for the future
Honestly, I think you two should remain friends. you two are too different!! Not going to school %26amp; not having or even caring about having a relationship is too big of a deal just ignore, not to mention the drug %26amp; alcohol problem, he even told u it'z hard for him to change, so why would u waist your time or someone like that? especially ';long distance';! It'z just too much, %26amp; u've only dated him for 3 weeks. Liking or loving someone az a friend, doeznt mean u can love/like that person az anything more, keep that in mind, u guyz are too different, hiz friendz don't like u, hiz flawz are BAD, drugs %26amp; alcohol are seriouse stuff, So imagine this, ur dating a drugie, who'z not even there!! It'z just not worth it , it'll never work out, I say stay good friendz %26amp; that it, %26amp; IF he doez change '; while u two are friendz '; then u can give it another chance, that's ';if'; u still felt the same.
Get rid of him he makes you ramble.
such a long question, i struggled reading it all.
here's what i think...you should write down the pros and cons of dating him. if there are more pros, then go for it, if more cons, leave him. especially since he's moving away.
i've dated a drug addict for 2 years and it was just too complicated, one day, he's gonna come to you and ask for money, one day you'll caught him doing something bad just so he could get drugs.
maybe his moving away is a sign that you two are just not meant to be? i don't know, but do write that pros and cons thing i told you about. it'll help you decide.
Move on honey, learn 2 love urself, u r so precious 4 him, move on, when u r near him he couldnt stop doing drugs, do u think that wn u have a long dist. rel.ship, he'll stop. u r so good 4 him %26amp; give urself time %26amp; u'll totally get over him.
My dear friend Jenny.
I know it's the most difficult problem in our life.
But never forget 1 thing- women can do everything.
I believe you can change him , love becomes beautiful when u believe. If u broke, u'll not feel good. Don't do that!
Just know 1 thing u'll be happy, if u fight!
First of all, Lcpl. Burress is right, you're attracted to him for other reason.
Second of all, he is a selffish person. He loves himself more than loving you. He only care for himself, he choose him first. He doesn't worth your love. Think about this. You would change to make him happy. Would he change to make you happy?
if he is used to have drugs you should leave him forever
Why would you want to keep seeing him as miserable as you say you have been with him? He doesn't sound too happy with you either. What good are either one of you getting out of this? It is obvious that he will do drugs and drink until HE is ready to stop. It is just as obvious you will never approve of his lifestyle. Stay friends if you can but forget the dating.
IF YOU NEED TO WRITE THIS LONG
THEN YOU NEED TO GO AN TALK TO
DR.PHIL
Your obviously atrracted to him for some reason maybe the whole bad boy rocker image appeals to you right now and when you get out of school you can settle down
keep him as a friend when he can get away from the life style he has and grows up you two may have a chance but he sounds like a good friend mabey when he moves back to your neck of the woods he will be ready for a relationship
It sounds like you two are better off as friends. You are forcing yourselves to try and make it work, and the keyword is forcing. If it don't come to you smoother or easier, back away from it while you are still friends.
way too long and boreing to read and even think of an answer.
The drug part caught my eye . Stay away from him now and forever
I am going to make this short and sweet. Why do you want to be stupid? He is a bum. You have something going for you. Why do you even want to wipe your feet on him? Move on' go find someone worthy of breathing the same air as you. This guy is on his way down. Don't let him take you with him. Break all ties' Let him go!!!
Hey, some advice on friends from all you wonderful people?
i wouldn't say i'm anti-social. i could get into a conversation with anyone, %26amp; i enjoy talking, i just dont like backstabbers. last year, there was one girl who was my best friend. we always hung out, %26amp; this is going to sound terrible, but all the other girls were backstabbers. but my friend moved away, %26amp; this year i started a new school. i made a few friends this year, but it was like almost everyone had their designated group of friends from their elementary schools %26amp; basically they stayed with those people. there are only two girls in my lunch period who i have ANY classes with (no lie) %26amp; they are both nice, but pretty quiet. dancing is my life (5-6 days a week), %26amp; it occupies almost all my free time, so i don't have much time for stuff w/ friends. now dance is coming to an end %26amp; i want to become closer friends w/ these 2 girls, but theyre both terribly quiet, %26amp; i feel it would be awkward if i asked them 2 hang out bc i probably shouldve done so sooner, is that totally weird? TIAHey, some advice on friends from all you wonderful people?
no it isnt weird you're just looking for some buddies. the 2 girls are probably just quiet because they're shy but wouldn't mind you wanting to be their friend. I don't see where you're doing any wrong. : )Hey, some advice on friends from all you wonderful people?
darling,
it's never too late. just don't say right out of the blue do you wanna hang out. talk to them get to know them then after a week or so ask them to hang out! =]
Ask them if they want to go to the mall, or go for coffee some day, it won't sound weired. Everyone wants to have friends, its never too late.
Good luck!!
There is nothing weird about approaching friends and asking them if they want to hang out, do something together, go to the movies, to a game etc... These girls maybe shy and will welcome your ideas. If if they say no, it is always better to try something good and sometimes fail than to try nothing and always succeed (president Roosevelt said that, or something to that extent)!!
GO FOR IT GIRL.
ok... you need to sit with them at lunch and talk to them before you ask them to hang out because usually if you dont no a person very good you probably would be really quiet so talk to them about school boys life whatever just talk to them then after like 2 weeks ask them to hang out with you. they wont be as quiet
ITS NOT TOO LATE! just get into a conversation with them and invite them to hang out.. like go to the mall... movies... etc. if they're good friends they'll be sweet and ilke ';yea!';
No way, it's never too late. Just ask them if they wanna do something with you that you really like doing. Should be a piece of cake
no it isnt weird you're just looking for some buddies. the 2 girls are probably just quiet because they're shy but wouldn't mind you wanting to be their friend. I don't see where you're doing any wrong. : )Hey, some advice on friends from all you wonderful people?
darling,
it's never too late. just don't say right out of the blue do you wanna hang out. talk to them get to know them then after a week or so ask them to hang out! =]
Ask them if they want to go to the mall, or go for coffee some day, it won't sound weired. Everyone wants to have friends, its never too late.
Good luck!!
There is nothing weird about approaching friends and asking them if they want to hang out, do something together, go to the movies, to a game etc... These girls maybe shy and will welcome your ideas. If if they say no, it is always better to try something good and sometimes fail than to try nothing and always succeed (president Roosevelt said that, or something to that extent)!!
GO FOR IT GIRL.
ok... you need to sit with them at lunch and talk to them before you ask them to hang out because usually if you dont no a person very good you probably would be really quiet so talk to them about school boys life whatever just talk to them then after like 2 weeks ask them to hang out with you. they wont be as quiet
ITS NOT TOO LATE! just get into a conversation with them and invite them to hang out.. like go to the mall... movies... etc. if they're good friends they'll be sweet and ilke ';yea!';
No way, it's never too late. Just ask them if they wanna do something with you that you really like doing. Should be a piece of cake
I need peoples advice about this problem?
Bacically the problem is this. I met a guy at schol who I really love and care about. I want to be wit him forever and i want to get married to him. Only problem is i live in a group home the group home sucks because it will not allow me to see my boyfriend unless i am on a home visit or discharged or at school. I want to be with my boyfriend what should i doI need peoples advice about this problem?
How old are you? Remember..someone has to support you and your boyfriend..running off will not do that. If it's truly love, you both can wait until your able to support yourself. Believe me, older people who have jobs have a hard time staying together...love does not conquer all nor pay the bills.
The reason the group home does not let you go off with him is because you can not be monitored that way. They are responsible for you at this time. Just make the best of it.I need peoples advice about this problem?
There is a way for the two of you to feel a bit better about having to be apart right now and that is to focus lots of energy into planning for the future. Work together to get through school, work together to get into college or technical programs. Open separate bank accounts and set goals for yourselves as to how much money each will put into their own account each week. make it a fun little contest. have a little contest with each other about grades, who can do the best and graduate with the most honors. Who can get their college degree first and get a professional job first. When you have accomplished all that together you will feel closer than ever and you will be able to be together on your own, your own money, your own home, your own plans. I know you really love him, and that love will last. He is worth working for so you can do this!
yep.
i had this friend that is a girl that had the same problem but it turn out differently i don't want to put you down. i just think that you should think about this married over again. 80% of highschool relationships fail the seinor year so dont give your hopes up on the wrong guy seents you do get to see him that much maybe reconsider on the right guy.
i agree with trouble wolf
How old are you? Remember..someone has to support you and your boyfriend..running off will not do that. If it's truly love, you both can wait until your able to support yourself. Believe me, older people who have jobs have a hard time staying together...love does not conquer all nor pay the bills.
The reason the group home does not let you go off with him is because you can not be monitored that way. They are responsible for you at this time. Just make the best of it.I need peoples advice about this problem?
There is a way for the two of you to feel a bit better about having to be apart right now and that is to focus lots of energy into planning for the future. Work together to get through school, work together to get into college or technical programs. Open separate bank accounts and set goals for yourselves as to how much money each will put into their own account each week. make it a fun little contest. have a little contest with each other about grades, who can do the best and graduate with the most honors. Who can get their college degree first and get a professional job first. When you have accomplished all that together you will feel closer than ever and you will be able to be together on your own, your own money, your own home, your own plans. I know you really love him, and that love will last. He is worth working for so you can do this!
yep.
i had this friend that is a girl that had the same problem but it turn out differently i don't want to put you down. i just think that you should think about this married over again. 80% of highschool relationships fail the seinor year so dont give your hopes up on the wrong guy seents you do get to see him that much maybe reconsider on the right guy.
i agree with trouble wolf
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